Torrents upon gallons upon leagues upon buckets have been pouring down in Norwich, and much of the rest of upstate NY for a few days now. This never seems like a problem. I mean, as a good friend of mine used to say, precipitation is like a fat kid. It’s great watching them fall from the sky, but not as great to watch them lay around on the ground. Or seep into your basement. Fucking fat kids, stay out of my basement! Ruining my carpet, my shoes, and my electronics that I have in storage, these fat kids just don’t know when to stop! And by fat kids, if you haven’t been following, I mean rain. Fuck you natural disasters!
There is one being I have to blame. Just one greater power who is the lone reason why I’m in wet shorts, why my basement is saturated, and why I need a snorkel just to sleep tonight.
Margot Fucking Berard. Send your hate mail folks. MargotBerard@Icommandelementalwaters.com.
For those of you who have had the misfortune to get between Margot and her wraith, I am sorry. I’d help you, but currently, I’m stranded on an island.
Oh well. I can’t go to work tomorrow… if there is a work tomorrow.
Margot is coming for you, Lynk. Your days are numbered!
~LD
