So, you are the stupid Demographic

There are many different types of people out there.  So many cultures, personality types, and fad followers create a diversity of people who, well, are all exactly the same.  These various societies change are born and die without warning, and come back after a few years only to be proclaimed as fresh and new.  A few of the more annoying demographics include Punk/Emo, Indie, and what I like to call, 70’s Burnout.  Others simply stick to a person due to their location, for example, Chenango County Rednecks and Long Island Idiots.  Just about every location has some sort of typical group of people who simply do not belong anywhere else.

I want to discuss the first three demographics that I’ve mentioned.  Punk/Emo is most widely known for being expressive, and holding true emotions that fellow punk community members can relate to.  This, I might add, is ridiculous folklore.  Punk/Emo is based off the music under the same name.  Usually uninspiring, simple-construct, mind-numbing songs come out of this.  Songs about teen stress, college hardships, and girls who want to “just be friends,” followed by muddy and ugly distortion guitars really should not lead to such a big fad.  Most people can relate to cutting themselves shaving, but there are few songs on the radio about that; Punk is nothing more than overused, washed-up and watered-down recycled blue jeans.  The preaching about favorite local bands is completely intolerable; nobody cares if you made out with the bassist and he wrote a song from your poetry about clouds.  Stop Emo, stop whining.

Indie is supposed to stand for Independent; it’s just a pretty catchy and innovated way to say it.  What will this group think up next?  Prepare to be amazed when your average Indie-rock band plays with their guitars out of tune, or an Indie-film comes out about a paranoid burnout who travels through time and talks to a man in a rabbit costume.  Indie is buying thirty-dollar pants with holes manufactured in the knees. Indie hates Hot Topic because it’s not Indie enough.  Indie is a section at JCPenny.  Indie is being a Vegetarian because it’s cool to not eat meat.  Indie is working on your hair all morning until it looks like you just crawled out of bed.  Indie is tight, faded track team t-shirts and a large part of the market for today’s ignorant youth.

The final group is by far the most entertaining.  The 70’s Burnout demographic are those who simply cannot conform because they somehow think that all the dead hippies from the 1970’s will come back and congratulate them with rainbows and bunnies.  If you are a part of this demographic, then you like tie-dye in a serious way and again, like the two groups above, feel so extremely moved by an extremely overrated form of music.  There is no hope for you.  Your need to rebel against all authority and base your lives on drugs have completely trashed your sense of rationality and responsibility.  You have made yourself worthless, and can no longer contribute positively to today’s world.  Congratulations.

So next time you feel that you need to fad yourself up, rebel against things just because are bored, and crank up your lousy music, remember, you are a part of the large and worthless demographic system.  You are exactly what you don’t want to be.



Pin It on Pinterest

Your friends would love this.

When you share my content, it helps me get out of bed in the morning, and if I do that, I might make more stuff.