Pips the Priority Parrot

Ever get through a day and realize you didn’t accomplish anything? You did lots of work, but nothing really got done. This is something many people deal with on a daily basis, and there’s only one guy to blame.

It’s pretty awesome having responsibilities. It’s my job to implement the overall direction and strategy of the company. I’m supposed to lead, guide, and evaluate the work of different departments while focusing in on internal initiatives. I also happen to be very good at answering questions, making educated decisions, and rolling up my sleeves and getting my hands covered in website droppings.

Whether you are a manager, a president, a CEO, or some other person in charge of something, you probably know this feeling. When something comes down the conveyor belt, it gets addressed. It doesn’t matter if it’s mission critical. It doesn’t matter if it wasn’t on your to-do list. You are wired to get shit done. That’s why you are in the seat you are in; because you are a magnificent, A-playing go-getter. Right?

You can thank this behavior to our little friend Pips. Pips is the Priority Parrot. Say hello, Pips.

Hello Pips!

Pips sits on your shoulder all day long pointing out all the stuff that isn’t already on your to-do list.

Uh oh, that email looked important!

You and Pips go way back. He’s kind of like a metal detector that finds action items. Pips has an amazing set of eyes. He catches every email notification, every new idea, and all customer correspondence. The trouble is, Pips doesn’t understand that you have objectives that, when completed, would usher in drastic improvements to the company.

You can grab that, right?

Pips isn’t very good at determining what’s worth your time and what isn’t.

That cold, not-a-fit prospect who wants to block off a two hour meeting to tell you why he’s such a big deal that giving him free services is his favor to you? Pips is all over that.

Did someone just glide by your desk with a new initiative for you to do? Pips expects you to handle pronto.

Don’t even get me started on internal conflicts…

Someone keeps stealing carol's hummus. Do something!

Pips is a stickler for detail (he gets his OCD from you).

There's an improper usage of a semicolon on a press release from 2002

Pips just wants to help you. He wants to see everything get done. You both know how important quality and communication are. It’s his job to encourage you, and for all he knows, he’s the momentum that is paving the way forward.

That brings me to my next point. Pips knows how much you kick ass. He knows you can handle heavy workloads with deadlines. He knows you are willing to work late. He also knows a good opportunity when he sees one and will keep pushing you to drop what you are doing to address everything that’s incoming.

This seems to happen the most when you schedule yourself to work on internal initiatives.

I know you are busy, but I just double-booked you with some pointless meetings, mmkay?

You see, Pips registers everything as a priority, especially if it’s from an outside source. Anything from an employee mentioning an idea to a customer suggesting a major change to a product line will get picked up by Pip the Priority Parrot. He won’t shut up and let you focus on what you set out to do on your schedule until you’ve worked through every single thing that crossed his radar.

In other words, Pips is shitting all over you and your day.

Pips is shitting on you and your day

PROTIP: Ignore Pips and get shit done!




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