There is something romantic about a state full of homeless old people, is there not? We might be saying fairwell to another massive number of trailer parks, but we are greeting warmly a new idea of aging hobo’s who cannot rebuild. Who would have known that hurricanes actually do strike the same place more than once. Ah, but the head strong elderly were confident, perhaps fighting the storm with religion, prune juice, and the American way. In other news, a man died of a flesh eating disease in Texas. Now that’s what we want to see in the news. Who cares about people fighting for the man in some pointless war, or the hippies who stand against it? This sort of thing does not belong on our news. Britney Spears’s drunken proposals, J-Lo’s countless marriages, and the number of college football teams that Paris Hilton has scored with are not important to anybody. If the entire cast of Friends were to be swallowed up in some giant redneck stampede never to be seen again, it would not affect anyone’s lives. What I’m trying to say here, is we need more awesome news, such as a man chewing off his own arm to continue chopping down trees in the rain forrest, or an old lady getting yelled at by a bunch of kids working at a McDonalds. Stop whining about unimportant news, like Martha Stewart’s life of crime, or the fact that we need more Euphonium players in Iraq to play at more U.S. Soldier’s funerals. It’s about time the world get’s some sort of super villian or a deady disease that turns people into Zombie Dave Matthew’s Band listeners. Two-Pac is dead, OJ is guilty, Christina Agulara is a skank, and there is no right choice to make for elections. Get over it. We get the idea. Thank you channel nine, thank you, all you brain dead media tards.
Oh, and stop blaming things on everything as well. “Studies show movies are making teens smoke,” or “School shootings are due to violent video games.” Maybe if more kids played video games, especially those shitty Tom Clancy games that everyone is creaming their pants about, would know you should hide behind a wall to prevent getting shot. Video games don’t kill people, idiots do. It’s a big circle. Idiots run the news, which gives idiots ideas, which in turn sends them into battle to fight for idiots, to destroy idiotic ideas just to lay down even more idiotic ideas. Oh yeah, I’m brash, I’m harsh, and many may question my moral stability, but not even deep down, in fact, right on top, on that protective coat of enamel, I’m right.
Let the hate mail fly in like an old man’s trailer in a hurricane!
dear god, your journal is pure sex